Tipper Gore Would Have My Head--X-rated Music and a Preschooler

I have created a monster, a mummy to be more specific.

Way back in The Time Before Children, Big B and I loved to go see bands. Since he was a bassist in a fairly successful regional band in his younger years and I have a long and sordid history as a Groupie, it is a past-time we both enjoyed.

Big B and I lived on separate ends of the state and did not know each other during our respective rock and roll days. If we had, though, I would have been on him like white on rice. There's something about a guy on stage that really gets me going. My friends and I used to think we could correctly assess a guy's bedroom style, if you know what I mean, based on how he acted on stage. For the most part, we were dead on.

Anyhoo, one Halloween night, Big B and I went to 12th and Porter in Nashville to see Here Come the Mummies, a Nasville funk band. It was one of the best shows I have ever seen, EVER. I have not danced like that in years. It was the best Halloween I have ever had.

Admittedly, they are a little kistcy. They dress up as Mummies and have this whole backstory mythology. They never really talk on-stage, preferring Mummy-speak like "Arghhhh" and "OOOOOOhhhhhOOOOhhh." They have songs like, "Bag of Bones" and "Ra Ra Ra."

Antics like this might seem a little silly except for the fact that these dudes are literally world-class musicians. No one really knows who they are and they deliberately keep it that way, but they are widely known to be Nashville session players. They make a living as studio musicians playing for other big-time artists or making commericals. The Mummy thing is just a side gig for fun.

Unfortunately, now that we no longer live in Nashville and the Mummies don't make it our neck of the woods very often, we don't get to see them very much. However, we do listen to their CD's on a regular basis and therein lies my problem.

Around Halloween, I ordered the Mummies' second CD and the day we received it in the mail, we put it on after dinner. Sweet Pea was entranced. He thinks they are real mummies, after all. In no time at all, Sweet Pea had a favorite song. A song not really befitting a preschooler. A song entitled, "Booty." I didn't think much of it at the time. I thought it would be a passing fancy.

Well, wrong.

My son now routinely asks me for the "Booty" song and sings alongs at full voice. His favorite line is "It's the time of day for sniffing like a dog." I am just waiting for him to start singing about booty at school or the grocery store. His second favorite song is "Dirty Minds."

I am going to hell.

I have amazed myself by managing to upload the song and you can listen to it here.

If you want to see a short clip of the Mummies in action, here you go.



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