Birth Control Advertisers, Look No Further. We're the Family for the Job.

I could regale you with stories about my daughter's disgustamundo ear funk pouring out of her infected ear tubes. Truly foul. Or I could tell you all about the hellacious trip to Kroger to get said daughter's ear drops and antibiotics. The trip wherein Sweet Pea and Ladybug fought the entire time, apparently trying to push each other out of the race car cart that is already difficult to maneuever but becomes very difficult to manuever when it is holding two wrestling children. I could tell you about how Sweet Pea screamed at the top of his lung repeatedly, while Ladybug pinched the bejeezus out of him. Or I could talk about the stares our little party ellicted. We truely looked like street urchins. Poor Ladybug was the worst. She had taken off one sock in the car and I had hurriedly just stuck her shoe back on. She then took the shoe off in the shopping cart so she had one bare foot that she kept waving in the air for God knows why. Her nose and mouth were covered in dissolved cookie particles held together with snot and her entire ear area was encrusted with soemthing too foul for words. She was wearing her brother's old jacket that needs a good wash and carrying her very disgusting pink dog, whose ears she likes to chew and sleep with in her mouth, resulting in chronic ear mildew. It was the kind of morning that makes you think, "Gee, I sure am glad Big B got snipped."

Yes, I could tell you about all this. Oh wait, I guess I just did. Hope your day was better than mine!