I am Crazy and Chivalry is Dead

It would seem that the universe is pointing me in a certain direction. Either that or I've lost my freaking mind!

At preschool on Wednesday, the day after I started Animal, Vegetable, Miracle, my son planted a bean seed. He was so excited. He came right home and started looking through the pantry because he wanted to plant one here. I found some dried red beans, we wrapped them in wet paper towels, stuck them in a baggie and taped them to the window. That evening, Sweet Pea could not stop talking about planting things. He is a frequent visitor to his great-grandmother's vegetable garden and his grandmother's flower garden and now wants to start his own. At bedtime that evening, I told Sweet Pea that we would stop at Lowe's on the way to the library and buy some seeds so he could grow a plant or two. Operative words here would be "a plant or two."

Later that evening, I got well into Animal, Vegetable, Miracle and made the decision that not only would we plant a plant for Sweet Pea, we would also attempt to grow some vegetables this summer. I was inspired. I was on my high-horse. We'll fight "the man" and give my son a lesson in agriculture!

So, yesterday on the way to the library, the kids and I selected a plethora of vegetable seed packets, some starting soil, and some little starter cups. I let Sweet Pea pick most of the veggies. He selected carrots, cucumbers, zucchini, several pepper varieties, green beans, and three types of tomatoes. I added my usual summer herb collection of chives, oregano, dill, thyme, rosemary, cilantro, and basil.

I have two small children. I have a dog who runs rampant in the backyard. I have no gardening experience. I just bought a gazillion packages of seeds to plant in my backyard, in a part of the country currently in a drought. I have lost my mind. This will be a learning experience, I am sure of that.

Now for the chivalry. The two bags of garden soil that I bought were humongous. Really large. I could barely lift them into the cart, and I am not that weak. I lift weights. I do push ups. I guess I need to do more, though, because these were too heavy for me. Of course there were no employees around and there never are. I managed to get them balanced at least on top of the cart, fairly evenly balanced I thought. Ladybug was in the cart seat, the bags balanced on top of the cart and Sweet Pea was walking beside us.

I made it to the checkout. The old guy at the checkout scanned everything and when I asked if anyone could help me get the bags into my car, he said there was no one available. OK, you jerks, I thought. I can manage.

We headed out into the parking lot. We were walking down the main lane in front of the store when we went over a speed bump and the cart tipped over. It was one of those slow motion things. I could see it all happen but could do nothing to prevent it. The momentum of the cart and the bags was too much for me to resist and the cart fell on its side, right on top of Sweet Pea, spilling Ladybug in a heap on the ground. Sweet Pea was screaming because he landed on his elbow. Ladybug was crying and trying to run away. I was trying to tend to them, right the cart, and pick up the 300 lb bags of soil.

Directly across the lane were two Lowe's employees, men, looking at the grill selection and talking to a customer, also a man of able body. All three saw the accident. Did any of the gentlemen come to assist? Nope. They just kept on flapping their jaws about the features of the grills, while I tried to keep my 18 month old out of traffic, calm my three year old and lift two giant bags of soil into the cart.

Who came to my rescue? You can probably guess it....two other mothers with babies. That's right, one mom held the babies while the other mom and I lifted the bags of soil into the cart.
And they say we're the weaker sex.

What a pathetic example of the male species these guys were. And Lowe's is lucky my kids were not seriously hurt.

More on the seed planting tomorrow.

Thumb, Sweet Thumb

My son is a thumb sucker. Not an occasional thumb sucker, but a full-time thumb sucker. His sucking is not limited to sleepy time. No, he sucks in the car and while watching TV. In the middle of playing, he often will retire to the couch for a quiet suck. The thumbnail on his preferred thumb never grows. I suppose any growth is sucked right off. It is often puckered and pruney. He loves his thumb.

It was no surprise to us that Sweet Pea took to thumb sucking. One of his ultrasounds showed him sucking his thumb in utero. For the first three months of life, he had a paci. We were never without a paci. We had pacis in the crib, in every room of the house, in the diaper bag, in the car, buried under the couch cushions, in the laundry basket. Everywhere. He loved them.

Then, at three months, he found his thumb and he never looked back. I would try to give him his paci, but he spit it out with a snarl, look at it with disgust, and shove his thumb back in his mouth.

I allowed the thumb sucking because, well, I was a thumb sucker. Until the age of 9. Really. I distinctly remember the feeling of comfort and peace that would wash over me as I sucked my thumb with my sock doll Polly in hand. I would hold her leg in my sucking hand and rub her softness against my nose as I sucked. All was right with the world. How cruel would I be to deprive my son of that pleasure?

Now, however, my leniency has come back to bite me in the ass. At 3 1/2 Sweet Pea is sucking as much as ever and it is affecting his speech. We had his speech evaluated and it is still within the normal range, but just barely. He has a frontal tongue protrusion caused by sucking and can not pronounce words correctly. There are times that we can not understand what he is saying because of the mispronunciation.

We need to limit the thumb sucking, but how? I can't make him totally quit. I have no control over what he does at nap time and nighttime. I can remind him during car rides and TV time to take his thumb out of his mouth, but what else can I do?

Suggestions?

The Good, the Bad and the Elephants

It's amazing how as mother, you can experience the highest highs and the lowest lows just in the span of a few short hours.

Today started out beautifully. The sky is blue, the sun is shining, it is warm. The perfect day to spend outside.

We had to get up a little early this morning to make it downtown for Ladybug's ear tube check. I was actually showered. Kids were dressed and at least one of them was fed. Traffic was fairly light. No problems.

Even the appointment went well, which was a nice surpirse. Ladybug has had several health problems in her short life of 18 months and has a resulting strong aversion to doctor's offices. She has an even stronger aversion to having her ears checked. I can't blame her. She had an ear infection for 6 months continuously and of course she associates ear checks with pain. This time though, she only cried at half her usual volume and for about half as long. She didn't even kick the doctor while he looked at her. And Sweet Pea did a great job of helping me and entertaining Ladybug.

Since the weather was so wonderful and since we were downtown and thus already halfway there, I decided to take the kids to the zoo. Sweet Pea loves, loves, loves the zoo. Of course all kids love the zoo, but his love for it is a little above average. Ever since he was very young, he has been entranced by animals. His favorite books are animal encyclopedias and he has an amazing bank of animal knowledge for his 3 and a half years. He can identify animals I have never heard of, such as echnidas and aye ayes. He knows which animals live where and is quick to point out any discrepancies in puzzles and games, like when the puzzle pictures a black bear next to a lion. He knows what they eat and how they use camoflogue. It will not surprise me at all if this turns out to be a lifelong love and he becomes a zoologist or vet.

We haven't been to the zoo in several weeks because of winter, so Sweet Pea was thrilled to be going. We arrived a little early, but the kids entertained themselves while waiting. Once the gates opened, we headed in and began our usual route. I had forgotten the stroller so I alternated between carrying Ladybug and letting her walk and she did a surprisingly well job of staying with me.

Sweet Pea's favorite animal is the elephant and so we had to go see them first. He had brought one of his stuffed elephants along to show the real elephants and was excited to see their reaction. Some workers were doing clean-up in the elephant habitat and we had to go into the elephant house to see the animals.

Inside the elephant house is a glass wall that looks in on the large elephant holding area. It is a cement-floored space with huge metal barred walls and doors. There were two elephants in the enclosures. One was standing in the back swinging his trunk back and forth. The other was pacing and periodically rubbing his trunk against the wall. We stood there a good 10 minutes watching them. After a few minutes, Sweet Pea said in a very sad voice, "Mommy, those elephants want to go outside." Then he told me he thought they were bored. It was such a precious moment. It was so affirming and heartwarming to hear my son's empathy for these animals and his sweet yearning for them to be happy. I was so proud of him in that moment. My sensitive and loving boy.

Just as we were leaving, the zoo keepers let the elephants outside and we stopped to have a snack and watch. The two giants literally ran out of the building into the open air and one let out a huge bellow with his trunk held high in the air. You could see how excited and happy the creatures were to be outdoors. Sweet Pea felt better now that the elephants seemed pleased and he enjoyed his snack while watching them.

We continued on through the zoo and at each exhibit, Sweet Pea lingered much longer than usual. He has always sped through everything, wanting to see and acknowledge each animal, but not spend too much time with each one. This time though, he really wanted to study them. He noted to me where each animal lived (grassland, jungle, etc) and asked detailed questions about them. He was so intent on each one. What a difference a couple of months makes. The visit was so wonderful and I was reminded of how much I enjoy these moments with my children and how I will miss them when I go back to work next year.

Around 11:45, both kids started to crash and we headed home for lunch. Sweet Pea doesn't like to eat breakfast and he had had several snacks throughout the morning, but he was starving. When we got home, I made their lunches, but it was too late. He had already reached the point of no return. He got very upset because his pizza was different from his sister's and threw a huge screaming tantrum. He threw himself on the floor, wailing, and rolled around for a good 15 minutes. I tried to pick him up and show him that his pizza was the same as Ladybug's, but he was too far gone. He caterwauled for the next 30 minutes and it was all I could do to get him calmed down enough for nap time. What a different boy he was from just an hour earlier, though it really was my fault for not having packed more snacks or leaving earlier than we did.

So, this morning was a study in contrasts, but that's OK. You have to take the good with the bad and in this case, the good certainly won out.

Who Can Explain the Mind of a Three Year Old?

Lately Sweet Pea's favorite activity is being a Daddy to his stuffed dog, Mr. Stinky. Sweet Pea likes to dress him up in old baby clothes and pretend he is a baby. He has arranged a whole little house around our play kitchen. He feeds Mr. Stinky, reads him stories and then puts him to bed. It is very endearing.

On Sunday, I noticed that Mr. Stinky had a companion in his bed with him, a cute little blond in pink pajamas.

"Who is this new baby, Sweet Pea? Is she a friend of Mr. Stinky's?"

"Yes, Mommy. This is Mr. Stinky's friend. "

I could make a joke here about how Mr. Stinky seems a little promiscuous, but that is not the point of the story.

"What is the new baby's name, Sweet Pea?" I asked.

"Name?" asked Sweet Pea.

"Yeah, what's her name? Are you going to give her a name?"

Sweet Pea thought for a minute and replied, "Goose."

"Goose? The baby's name is Goose?"

"Yes, Mommy. This is Goose."

Meet Goose: